Resolutions -- or Goals! -- for 2012

It's that time of year again, and I have to assess 2011's goals and repurpose them for 2012.

Thankfully, this is not too hard to do, since I have been pretty steadily working on each of my 2011 goals and thinking a lot during the last week about how to revise them for 2012.

Here we go!

2011's goals were, as I took them in this blog:

1. Improve Overall Health
2. Change My Living Situation
3. Manage My Resources
4. Build a Better Community
5. See Creative Work to Closure

Health: This was only an okay goal, over the course of the year. While I worked on stabilizing my hormones and depression, I did not embrace exercise. For that reason, my weight and overall condition did not improve (note to self: it's true about exercise!). Positive outcomes: my depression is under control, my mood swings and other perimenopause symptoms are under control. My allergies/sinus problems flared up in the final weeks, but using a humidifier every night (!) as well as increasing my intake of H2O hugely improved that, rather than the OTC remedies I started with. Overall, I am in great health. Negative outcomes: my LDL cholesterol is high and not coming down, my weight is still over the line and not budging except bits and tweaks. I need to lose serious poundage and remember to maintain my health through habits of hydration, nutrition, movement, and meditation.

Living Situation: 100% improvement, maybe 150%. No more crackhead landlord, no more cracker box, reduced rent, more green space, and more light. Thsi one was a total success, despite sacrificing a good deal of savings on the 3-month overlap of spaces.

Resources: Time is a constant battle, between "shoulds" and "want tos." Yo, I'm human. However I did add the Rescue Time Robot to my desktop, and it tells me I am 79% more productive than average. So shut up, Critic's Voice! Money is another, different battle, but this year I did pretty well. I have a more affordable appartment (and even though I might only be saving $100/month, the happiness factor makes that huge). I rearranged my retirement $$ is a way that makes me feel more secure. I opened several successful venues of frugality for decluttering, including selling unwanted items. Energy is the real battle, and that's the 2012 focus.

Community: This, too, was a success. I joined a short story group of women I enjoy and while we've only met once, I look forward to more meetings. I opened myself to the performing community in town, and am building bridges there. I opened myself to the community on my campus, and am trying to open out of my division, my school, and into the university in a positive way. I need to set more goals here, however, and be open to groups of strangers.

Creative: This was a big success! I sold my first novel (coming out in June!) and have almost completed the second, which I am certain will be equally salable. I sent out my short plays in a month-long binge and have had one hit so far, and three rejections (so I've got a long way to go). It felt great, however, challenging myself to complete and submit projects.

Overall, 2011 was a good year in terms of my goals. I plan to build on that in 2012:

Improve Overall Health: not much change here in direction. However, I plan to focus specifically on maintaining good habits (like using the humidifier every night) while building new ones (like 30 minutes of movement every day). I'd like to add daily meditation and vitamins, but I think I'll be conservative in this area, since it is one that truly needs daily focus.

• January-April: make it a habit to spend 30 minutes every day in movement of some kind
• May-August: add daily meditation (which will work with my 2012 summer plans)
• Sept-December: add supplements and vitamins
• get a mammogram
• get a colonoscopy
• get a dermascan 

Living Situation: This is easy. Renew lease on apartment (i.e., don't move!). More, start researching the pre-fab house I love in detail through contacting the company and chatting with them. And start looking at the places I think I want to build it: Oregon, Northern California, and Washington are the three places I'm thinking about now. But they might stink once I look around. So... research.

Resources: As ever, my biggest battle will be managing time. I have come to hate scheduling and to-do lists. And yet.... I need a new car, I need a new mattress & box spring, I need to pay down (or off) my credit cards. All worthy goals, all hard to do at the same bloody time! This year I want to build on my basic foundations of frugal saving and repurposing and decluttering: I find that I am about done with the wholesale donations to Goodwill, etc., and while that is an easy and intelligent manner of getting things OUT OF MY HOUSE (and onto my tax savings) I must needs find other ways to open what one of my favorite blogs refers to as "additional revenue streams." And finding new energy is part of the Health intiatives above, plus the hormones.

Community: continued reaching out, across phone, email, work/personal connections to develop relationships with new people/groups as well as people I already like, love, and connect with.

• Habitat for Humanity: in the Dallas area
• Alum group: for connections and fundraising/support of current programs
• Short story group
• Theatremakers/academics/women in both

Creative: Here, I have very specific goals

• Finish and sell second and third novels
• Binge with short plays in February and Sept-Oct
• Journal daily: dreams, ideas, etc.
• Finish and send two reviews
• Finish and send encyclopedia entries
• Polish and send two articles (from ALA papers, 2011) to journals
• Present two-three conference papers (one scheduled, July)
• Blog daily (in either blog) and continue to post my own photos

Here is my overall goal for 2012: Make lemonade all year long, every day.

I am so tired of negativity, including my own. I really believe everything is an opportunity, seen in the right light. Context and response are everything... they can turn what looks like failure or an impass into something wonderful. Not to be goopy or stupid about it, but to stop letting myself define my view by others' vision. Ugh! Especially since I am butt-tired of the men in my life having stupid, negative, misanthropic outlooks anyway.

Oh, does that sound negative? Nope: it's all good.

Priorities

It is quite possible that my priorities are out of order. I mean by other people's standards or expectations.

This is something I have been considering for some time.

For example: after I moved again (to this lovely new apartment), one co-worker remarked, "You moved? Again? Why don't you just buy a house?" Like me, she meant. Her first act on moving here 17 years ago, was to buy a house. Of course, she was hired at a better income level and with complete security so... we weren't exactly in the same place then. Another colleague, from a different department, said something similar only a couple days ago: surprise that I moved again, to another apartment, rather than buying a house.

But why have I moved four times since I came to this town, living in five different apartments for periods between one and seven years? Why not buy a house and be like everyone else with homeowner security?

Good questions.

For example: after I got tenured and promoted the first time why didn't I turn around and focus my energy on the next promotion? (There aren't all that many in the academic world, outside of moving into administration, ugh.) Why didn't I invest my time in writing and publishing in academic journals and books, like everyone else? Especially since I like research and find history fascinating. Why put my time into teaching, which is more and more becoming a low-level activity for professors? In other words, I am not defining "success" in traditional academic terms, and possibly not in the terms of My U.

What then are my priorities in the area of teaching, research, and academic progress?

Good questions.

As a kind of sideways answer, I can say that 2011has been about exploring and pushing at new areas in my life for balance. Like improving my living situation by moving to this fab new apartment, decluttering my goods, and turning toward buying land and building a house for retirement (2012 project!).

Like building a new community, improving my current community, and making new ties professional and personal for career, health, and sanity reasons. Initiating new projects to build connections across job and personal lines.

Like changing my diet to a non- (or low-) sugar/no processed or fast foods/three-meals-two-snacks a day minimum. Increasing exercise -- walking, biking, yoga -- for heart health. Taking care of allergies.

Like adding creative habits to my weekly activities: writing prose, photography, cooking, even teaching.

Like working on my resources: money of course, but also time and possessions and friendships and skills. Like using my time in more intelligent, more positive ways -- ways that please me, support me, feed me.

Some of this I have been successful at -- on my terms. So considering priorities and consciously setting some -- for 2012 -- is next. And I can say that it has been a long time since I've even been interested in setting short-term or long-term goals. This is another healthy step.

Yesterday's Coup

Saturday, I made a coup at Buffalo Exchange here in the Big D.

http://www.buffaloexchange.com/index.php

Buffalo Exchange is a thrift store chain that buys and sells clothing, shoes, and accessories. I managed to get them to take two coats and three dresses, receiving in exchange scrip to use in their store. A decent amount, too. The rest of the stuff, that they didn't take, will go directly to Goodwill next week.

I've been meaning to check them out again for some time (in July I got shot down with an armload of coats). I am also told to bring said coats back in 2-3 weeks for successful sale/trade; I have two pairs of boots, too.

Woo-hoo!

Part of my clearing out the closet action. These were clothes I bought and never wore, or clothes I bought and didn't wear because I felt wrong in them, or in one case something given to me I didn't particularly like. Three great reasons to unload clothing so someone else can love it. And Goodwill will take the rest.

And... more news

Yesterday, I hired one of my former students to research grants for current projects. If we find some stuff to pitch, she'll help me write grants for funding or underwriting. I'm hoping we can find some monies to over-fund the department projects.

This is a great thing! She'll do the research, she'll help with the writing and the pitch, she'll be paid and earn creds for resume, I'll get money.

Downside? None.

And I'm giving her my Craigslist coffemaker (my dream coffeemaker!) and my Craigslist chair and footstool. Even more upside! These things will be out of my house, out of my life and happy happy happy with new people. Sigh... of pleasure.

Shopping frugally in a consumer utopia

This being Tuesday, my focus is frugality, but given the onset of the new semester at My U, I want to talk a bit about style and shopping.

In case you weren't aware, the Big D is a consumer utopia, where shopping is a sport. I have never lived anywhere with so many malls, gallerias, strip malls, big box stores, chain stores and high-end luxury chains (if you can call Chanel, Hermes, Jimmie Choo, and Tory Burch "chains"--but aren't they? Chain boutiques?) in such a concentrated area--which the DFW areas is, despite sprawl.

The big boxes and chains have replicated, moreover, until one doesn't have to drive ten miles in order to shop in a major anchor-department store, discount big box, or mall chain. One does have to search out the small and concentrated areas where the high-end chain boutiques live, but they are, basically, within 3-5 miles of each other, clustered in Dallas, in Fort Worth, or in the suburban enclave where the rich hang out.

And the farther from Big D's center/downtown you drive, the bigger the stores: H-U-G-E. Like our churches, in fact. The suburbs apparently cater to tremendous crowds gathered at once, while in town not so much.

This is the culture. It extends not only to clothing and accessory shopping, but to restaurants and gourmet food sites, home decorating sites, and technology. DFW-ites SHOP.

That said, DFW is not a "style" mecca. Shopping is encouraged--nay, required, but style is not. It is more elusive, just like everywhere else.

I used to live in NYC and shop like the best: daily, rigorously, and ruthlessly. Even on a starter salary in book publishing, I shopped... hence, credit card debt but a fabulous array of accesories and shoes I still wear every week. That was the old me, however: the new me wants style without debt.

Here's the first in a series of frugal tips I have learned by living in this shopping utopia, each of which applies, I think, to anyone living in our American consumer culture:

• Stay out of stores, malls, and gallerias if you don't want to spend money: don't browse, "stop in," or "take a quick look." I always walk out with something, and whether it is a $5 bottle of body lotion or a $300 pair of shoes, it is an impulse buy. I will be sorry. Then what?
• I don't go to T.J.Maxx or SteinMart or Marshall's anymore. This is a personal decision, sparked by two things: the constant condition of chaos and sloppiness in every outlet, and the fact that every buy I make is an impulse, drawn on what "might" be there when I stop in, not careful thinking about what I actually have and what I can afford, right now. Again, whether it is a $5 or a $300 impulse, it is a waste of my money. And time, later, when I have to donate/sell/trash the item. 
• I shop catalogs of stores I like, then go in and try on only the pieces I've picked out as possiblities--with the rock-hard knowledge that I probably won't buy anything. I take the catalogs with me and use the salespeople as resources. If they don't have the item in my size or color, which is the closest outlet that does?
• I go to the mall to look for one specific item. I did this last year for a "white button-up blouse": before I went I wrote down what I wanted from the blouse (basic design details about cut, collar, needs), and which stores I would visit. I blocked out an entire morning (not a weekend one!), parked close to the most likely store, and looked at nothing but white blouses. Tried them all on, went back and bought two from the same chain--one a kind of boyfriend style, one shaped--and was happy that I had spent my money well. Bonus: I now know which stores fit my shape and size best--no need to waste time with the ones really tremendously wrong for me. Cancelled their catalogs, too.
• Basically, a store is a last resort--once I know what I want to buy, or at least have a very good idea.
• If you want help, do not go on a weekend between 11 am and 330 pm.
• If you do not want help, go on a weekend between 11 am and 330 pm.

That's it, for now. Just a starter smaple of some pretty simple ideas about how to avoid debt, impulse buying, and to give an end-run to consumer addiction. We all have to buy things every day, but I find that the more conscious I am about how I buy something, the better.

First Day of the Semester

At My U, today is the first day of fall 2011.

Not a bad first day: met with both writing classes. Beginning playwriting seemed fierce and surprised at how much fn we had. Advanced playwriting seemed truly interested in the challenges ahead.

Of course, I have some nice perks for the advanced writers, which are just starting to emerge...

Tomorrow is the big, lecture-oriented class... so we'll see what happens then.

So far... so good.

Thursday's morsels

Yesterday I was out all day at My U doing pre-semester meets/n/greets thinly disguised as faculty seminars.

Our "orientation" period has shrunk from a 2-day retreat and 5 days of student meet/n/greets to 1 day of university/school faculty meets and 90 minutes of student meets/n/greets. Not completely certain this is better...

However!

My spanking new printer came yesterday! The UPS Man is my new BFF, and my vacuum, which was formerly my Favorite Appliance, is now second to the fabulous wireless printer... Hooray!

I sense jealousy, however, when the spanking new laser pointer gets delivered...

Tuesday and the New Frugality

Okay, we're back on The New Frugality.

This summer, I've been paying extra attention to money coming/going out, because I am finally figuring out my own spending patterns, as well as my general household expenses in this New Apartment. I wasn't teaching this summer (no extra income coming in, in other words) but I did travel twice--once to Boston and once to Utah (income definitely going out!).

I also moved without planning for it, simply because my old situation became untenable. The upside was my wonderful new apartment (and I've been really enjoying it this summer), but the downside was 2.5 months of double rent. While I eventually got my security deposit back from my old landlord (intact), that still meant 1.5 month's of double rent--which was not in my financial plan.

In August, then, where am I?

• in an apartment with electric costs lower than a year ago, despite the heat and my being on-site (surprise!);
• with a pantry full of food given me by a friend that I am gradually winnowing down or giving away;
• with a rejuvenated savings account, because the security deposit went there;
• with increased credit card balances because that's where the travel monies and "extras" have come from.

Sadly, I have increased my card balances by about $1.5K, given flights, hotels, rental cars, meals on both trips.  This isn't terrible, but I'll be paying for it longer than I wanted to and, if I teach a night class this fall, more of it will end up in these balances than in the savings account, which was not my hope.

Eventually the Boston trip will become a tax deduction (flights, cabs, hotels, meals, and conference registration, at least). And I still have to complete my 2010 tax filing, which should net me a return.

Here's what I've noticed overall, this summer:

• While I read all the time, I no longer buy "new" books. I buy used books on Amazon, second-hand books here in town, and audio book & e-books on line, getting them either for free or discounts.
• While I watch TV and movies, I use Netflix and Hulu, and the combined cost is less than monthly cable service (and I am probably going to end my Hulu membership).
• I no longer buy iTunes anything.
• I pay full-price for hair care (cut and color) from a very good but reasonable salon, and use monthly membership discount for massage... which is great, by the way.
• I do my own manicures and pedicures, and I actually find doing them relaxing.
• Getting more/deeper sleep and drinking more water and green tea have done more for my stress level and skin than any expensive skin care. Now I've got to add regular exercise and vitamins to that!
• I am eating in, and finding cleaning out my own pantry and gorging on seasonal fruits and vegetables makes me feel better and more energetic and look better than eating out. Little sugar or processed foods, plus cooking, make me happy.
• I am spending less on green cleaners and making my own, and reducing chemicals all around me.
• I am finding my old mindset of buying extras or sale items because "what if" is disappearing: now I ask, "Do I already have this or something like this?" and "Do I need this?" and "Do I need this now?"
• I have cleared out a lot of sentimental clutter, and plan to follow that up with one more big ol' Goodwill donation run this week, before the semester starts. After that, I am done.
• Goodwill, consignment stores, and second-hand bookstores are where my discards are going; now that I've gotten rid of a lot of my clutter, I am being more mindful about how I might use these sites as barter or repayment sites, rather than simply donating.
• My apartment is cleaner, clearer, and the clutter has been substantially reduced throughout my household. 

My goal through September: reduce weekly grocery bills. Which means being more about quantity than anything: I buy too much. I'm going to plan menus ahead of time, incorporating sales brochures and the protein/fruit/vegetable mix I've been using with such good results. And finish with my own Pantry Challenge! By October, I want an empty pantry--to match my empty fridge.

Goals 2011: Updates

For myself, I am checking in on my 2011 goals.

Improve My Health: I am really pleased with my work over the last couple of months (the summer) in this particular area. After hearing about the jump (whoo!) in my LDL cholesterol, I took specific action here: red yeast rice, oatmeal, increased activity. I am revising my eating habits to eliminate sugar, processed foods, white flour, and other nasty triggers. How do I know it's working? Last night I went out to eat at a local restaurant that specializing in souffles. I had a souffle for dinner that had great flavor (tomato and pesto) but was basically a triple helping of bread pudding, with apricot tart and ice cream for dessert. did I feel bad? Yes. Bloated, sleepless, congested, constipated, and all-around uncomfortable from both the amount of food and the nasty sugar-carbo dump. Don't mean to overshare, but this is a good thing. It means that on a daily basis I am eating a healthy, well-portioned, non-sugar diet incorporating fresh fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and lean protein. Yay, me!

Stated goals: on track with room for still-signicant accomplishments in 2011

Living Situation: Well, my living situation has improved for the better, as we all know. I lurve my New Apartment, and it is slowly but surely getting clutter-free. This week, I did whip the Dreaded Study into shape, and will continue that work this week; the plan is that by Wednesday it will be where I want it for the beginning of the semester.

What's next? Managing resources (time and space) to make the apartment rally comfortable and workable.

Managing my Resources: I am still working on managing my time and focusing better. Some days, it simply feels as is I have ADD: I am scattered, multi-task without balance, and feel at the end of the day as if nothing was accomplished although I was "busy" all day...

Financially, I have re-tracked my retirement funding and alrady (since January) seen a significant growth in that area. This summer I also started gradually increasing my own donations so that by the end of the year I will have shifted pre-tax dollars to retirement funding in such a way as to not feel the loss. I have also paid down or eliminated my credit card debt positively, and my overall credit rating is excellent. By spending time focusing on my spending habits, I have been able to curtail impulse spending as part of my overall move toward decluttering/minimalizing my life. While I will never be a "100 things" or a "six items or less" person, I have definitely moved away from old habits of getting and spending.

This fall, I intend to focus on time as my significant resource: time for student work, time for my creative endeavors, and saying "no."

Build a Better Community: This goal is tough. The community I was tied into has scattered significantly during the last year, and I am still looking for new ones. I beleive my greatest challenge this fall will be re-integrating myself into my department at My U well, and on my own terms. I have already been talking to colleagues about creating new "groups," and I realize that I have work to do in recognizing and building community.

Part of this is about me seeking out communities for various aspects of my life. I both want and need to reconnect with my own students. I need to connect to communities that reach across campus outside of departmental lines. And, yes, doing the work that community building entails: meetings, contributions, nurturing and working. Too often, this doesn't interest me. Why,  I am still uncertain.

Seeing Creative Work to Closure: Here, I have been very successful.

• brought playwriting festival to successful fruition, including 7 scripts nurtured (March)
• completed, edited, and submitted novel to publisher and received contract (to be signed, this week)
• proposed, wrote, and presented paper at national conference (May; now, rewriting as article)

I have avoided perfectionism and space issues. I have just submitted four more paper proposals (through summer 2012) and am 1/3 of the way through my second manuscript. I have initiated a writing schedule and am doing a pretty good job of keeping it... most days. I am also setting monthly goals--more manageable for me.

July's goals:

1. increase weekly activity for good of LDL lowering
2. get all clutter out of dining room
3. get second ms. 2/3 completed
4. get all syllabi completed
5. initiate one new student-based activity for fall

Back on line!

I've been out of town and dealing with stepping up to the summer schedule I created for myself. That's been giving me a lot of "to do" priorities.

 

Things I'll be talking about in the next week or so:

1. My annual check-up and summer cooking
2. Big D's Farmer's Market: is it worth it?
3. My trip to the Great NorthEast
4. Paris: the Caillebotte Brothers' exhibition (would that I were in Paris!)
5. Downsizing my stuff
6. Temptations
7. Men in Power
8. Bad Chat

Yes, a lot has happened that I've been thinking about, talking about, and doing. Looking forward to sharing!

Frugal Tuesday: The Spiritual Headslap

The second day of my "summer" freedom.

Usually on Tuesday I provide myself with a tally of savings or losses during the past week. This alternately gives me a sense of accomplishment (moving forward) or failure (dropping back), or sets me up with an active goal to attack, like the failed Pantry Challenge. (Is it really a failure if the fridge/freezer/pantry are filled from a friend's generous gifts or the leftovers from a really great party? OK, not so much.) Looking back, I realize that, week to week, I am ahead or behind nearly equal amounts. What has become different is that I think longer and more fully about what I want to buy, eat, wear, read, and how I will address that.

Case in point: yesterday I went out to run errands. I had four, and I planned my driving in a circular manner that would take me to/through each one in a neat circle. (I love geometry -- math that I use!) Then I realized that I wanted to find a book by a favorite writer's other pseudonyms. Thought about buying it as an audiobook (if it existed that way) -- but that depends so much on the performer. Thought about buying it as an ebook (first title in series not available as ebook) or from Amazon at a discount. Ultimately decided (while I was pumping gas) to try the half-price store because my plan is, after all, to sell it back, get rid of it after I read it, to re-circulate it, and it is not possible to share ebooks or audiobooks... yet. The only way to read this book and re-use it was to buy the book and sell it back, later (or donate it). There was a Borders next to the gas station, but there was the half-price store another mile away, where I would find the paperback book (if I could) at 50% cost plus my teacher's discount. Drove there. Found several books: decided to buy one, because I'm simply checking this second line out, although I am pretty certain I'll like them. She's a good writer. And buying it at half-price made sense, in that case.

This whole thought process wouldn't have occured to me five months ago. I would simply have gone to Borders and bought at least one, maybe more, of the books. My investment yesterday? A mile's worth of gas, fifteen minutes finding and buying it, $3.35, and the three hours reading it this morning. personal satisfaction of buying mindfully. And I had a nice conversation with the guy who helped me find it, and ran into a friend I hadn't seen for a while. I got to hear about his trip to London with students and his pacemaker. All in all, a worthwhile investment.

But it gave me the proverbial head slap -- not the real kind, where someone actually hits you but the spiritual kind, where truth or reality or something smacks you around for a while, making you pay attention.

 

I've been reading a lot of blogs that focus on "frugality" or "minimalism" since October in an attempt to find a few reference points for myself as I worked to de-clutter my apartment and my life. But my goals for 2011 are more about management and change. Head slap!

 

The first thing I realized yesterday is that I need to make my own definitions of the topics under consideration. There is a huge difference between frugality, decluttering, minimalism, and emptiness. Many of the blogs I read are all about getting rid of or managing stuff -- mostly tangible material items -- whether they focus on any of the first three. Some of the people writing about de-cluttering are really writing about organization: finding better ways to manage or maintain or access their stuff, which is not the same thing. Neatly organized clutter is still clutter; it's possible that it is less disturbing to that individual, but not to me. Any more.

A neatly organized hoarder is still a hoarder, and it's only a matter of time before they are, once again, the Collyer Brothers perched among their newspaper stacks. Now incorporating all the fabulous organization/storage products I lovelovelove.

Some people writing about decluttering write about simply emptying their homes and lives of junk. Their struggle is to eliminate the junk.

Both interested me for a while. I read blogs and bought books about organizing, about decluttering, about eliminating. But it is not enough, and I finally figured out why. Head slap!

Here's how I define the terminology:

• Frugality is actively considering all the costs of something prior to commiting those resources, and trying to "spend" efficiently, be it money, time, energy, or spiritual currency.
• Decluttering is the practice of moving clutter of any kind out of my life and my space. Permanently (not in my garage or a storage space I rent or my mom's attic).
• Minimalism is keeping the "stuff" in my life to a level at which it doesn't take over and control me, my time, my future; further, that everything I do own contributes something significant, including beauty (the William Morris philosophy).

But these are all useless without further change on my part. Each of them, when practiced correctly, leaves emptiness.

And that's dangerous. That's where I see the trap ahead of me: the empty space where new "stuff" rushes in.

Because something else will: all the blogs that focus on minimalism, decluttering, or frugality -- or, rather, the good ones -- don't just talk about emptying out the basement. They complete the act of "lessening" with adding something valuable to the free space. Because there is no "empty" space, but there can be a void. If I just have a void, I'll fill it again, with stuff and distractions in order to avoid the void. If I get the distractions and stuff out of the way, the hope of anyone really practicising frugality or minimalism is that there is the time, space, and desire to do something else, something greater or just more fulfilling than the crap you're owning or doing pre-decluttering.

What good is emptying the basement if it just fills up with newer, frugal crap?

Dig a hole. Fill it up. Head slap.

So filling -- fulfillment -- is the second half of the activity... maybe the harder part. After all, we clutter and shop and fill our lives with meaningless stuff to avoid the meaningful stuff, right? We allow others' priorities to derail or distract us because our own needs are scarier than theirs, or more naked, or more confusing to other people.

But what I have noticed about minimalist blogs and frugal blogs is that while there's a lot of advice about eliminating stuff, about the personal call to declutter and detox one's 21st century life, there is much less about how to spiritually/creatively/intellectually/actively fill up the apparently giant hole within us. About either the process of refilling or the "stuff" of fulfillment.

I think this is because when one decides to declutter, it is necessary (if it is to be an effective and complete act) to distance oneself from the "stuff." To depersonalize Aunt Grace's china and childhood stuffed toys and your best friend's gag gifts before being able to donate/sell/trash the stuff. Once you start, shedding is relatively easy and can become almost a reverse compulsion. (Something I've noticed in the language of some blogs: these voices sound like those of anorexics or medieval pentients, punishing themselves for have any but the most utilitarian multi-use items and pride in few tiny material objects still left in their universe... and for how long?) 

But decluttering is only one step, which is where frugality and minimalism come in. To be successful, this has to be a change that I practice daily, for the rest of my life. Thus, it is about mindfulness and envisioning a life that I have ignored or distracted myself from wanting or creating, or something like that. Hence, my goals for 2011 -- and I didn't even know what I was doing when I defined them! Hel-lo, universe!

So now that I have dug myself into a hole, I have to fill it up. Better, this time. Damn it, that means change.

Yes, it was a spiritual head slap.

Catching up on goals for 2011

Since the first quarter of 2011 is gone, I want to update myself on my progress this year.

Improving my health: While I haven't lost any weight, the weekly yoga classes and rides on the bike to and from My U have been great. Ditto moving the "small stuff" into my new apartment. I feel better. And I'm adding happy face stickers to my calendar on a daily, not weekly, basis for every day I complete 30 minutes or more exercise. Weight Watchers has been a bit of a bust, but I am hanging in there. The best news: thus far, I have had no serious allergy/sinus episodes (meaning, lasting longer than 4-5 days), which is already a huge difference from 2010. And I have definitely improved my mental self-talk: no more beating myself up. I am catching myself earlier, rescripting my interior monologues, and simply refusing to listen.

Changing my living situation: In progress. By April 30, I will be entirely in the new apartment, enjoying 50% additional space, a wet bar, an outdoor patio, and a kinder, gentler, non-crazy landlord.

Manage my resources: Regular payments into credit accounts have already closed out three of my four cards; the other is being paid down steadily. Moving means decluttering, selling, and throwing away; yesterday I visited Buffalo Exchange with some clothing, for example. Pantry challenge is slowly but steadily emptying my cupboards and freezer. Time continues to be precious, but I feel I have a better handle on it right now. technology: set "acting" folders in emailboxes, clean out email boxes weekly, set daily times to check email (no more than 3 times daily!).

Build a stronger community: Making time for coffee, dinner, brunch with friends. Part of the charm of my new place is that I can, finally, entertain friends at home again!. Working on My U community and local theatre community to develop connections. Working on distance relationships with great friends who live too far away. One goal I want to leap on: connecting with Habitat for Humanity this month.

Creative work and closure: Sent out novel manuscript. Sent out plays and monologues. Subscribed to Script Frenzy, and opportunity to write 100 pages in 30 days (11 down!). Pitched proposal for play translation to colleague (more about this, this week, and I continue to negotiate this situation!). Brought playwriting festival at My U to successful process/production incorporating not only students but faculty and guest visitors. Oh, and writing my blog at least 5 times weekly.

The good news is that I have been active in each category and accomplishing small goals, or parts of larger goals.  Since balance is my overall goal for 2011, I am pleased with my small series of accomplishments; a lot has actually been done.

Goals for March 2011

Already! It's March and I'm trying to set goals.

February got sucked into the "student project" vortex, and actually, I'll still be there until 3.11. The outcome is completely worth it, but time has been scarce for anything else.

With that in mind, here's what I want to do in March:

• start moving into the new apartment (and maybe finishing, too!)
• sell several things out of the old apartment on Craigslist and Amazon
• continue the pantry challenge into and through March, so I won't be moving all that food
• ride the bike to school twice weekly
• go to the batting cages once a week
• read 5 books on my list of 50
• find a site to learn to shoot

In addition, I want to plan my summer completely, given that I probably won't be teaching any classes. I intend to go to Utah to see a friend at the Shakespeare Festival there, but otherwise to stay in Big D. I will be writing a lot, riding the bike, decorating the apartment, and doing research. And... ?

This week in frugality

This week went better. I confined myself happily to one meal out, one beer with friends, and one beer with students. Simple grocery shopping. Found a source for Jack's favorite cat food that is 30-40%. Put money back into savings.

Whew!

Also:

• I went through my clothes again and pulled out the vintage pieces and a few more consignment pieces. My goal is to either sell these or get store credit for them. Either would suit me and lighten my closet.
• My IRA fund is now transferred to its new carrier, and I feel soooooo much better about that.
• I worked out a calendar for the rest of the year, based on the scenarios where I teach two classes this coming summer and one in the fall, or none, in order to assess paying back debt and saving money. Surprisingly even if I don't teach a single, extra class, with the new apartment, I'll still be able to save money and pay off debt.
• I gave myself a specific task for every month, to save money or generate it.

This may sound silly, but for someone who never lived with a budget despite earning a steady paycheck (even in grad school) since she was 21, this is huge. Two years ago I realized that I was just not facing my income, my debt, and my future, just floating along (like most Americans!) earning and spending and continuing debt. Not good for a single woman hoping to retire in something more than a cardboard box.

Fortunately, I did actually have the sense to let a really smart money manager set up my money when I first came to the Big D, before she moved on to other jobs. So things have been earning and flowing, but more like the natural prairie than a well-tended garden, if you know what I mean. Lately I've been doing a little weeding, a little putting in order. And it feels good.

Spending the last four months purging and decluttering and selling in a serious way--and definitely more to come before and during The Move--has been liberating. Paper, clothes, housewares, books, CDs, DVDs, and "stuff" has left my life. Cleaning out e-mail boxes and filing bins and so forth... wow! Great for me.

As well as realizing that a smaller TV, my old stereo, my bike, an old car, and a Nook could be enough.

I am not a minimalist in the "100 Possessions" way, or the "10 Piece Wardrobe." I'd get so bored! I like stuff and variety... but I want to have "stuff" that is essential, rather than something I bought to fill a void or time. DVDs I never watch. Books I never read. Clothes I never wear--as pretty as they were on the rack. Too much stuff is distracting, too little is boring. Finding the happy medium--which also means getting to know oneself--is much better.

Frugal Pantry Challenge: Week 1

This week I made the following dishes out of my pantry, freezer, and refrigerator:

• Lemony Grilled Sardines (1 serving)
• Carrot Soup (8 servings -- still eating this!)
• River Trout with Dill-Butter Sauce (2 servings--didn't make the sauce, bought with trout)
• Banana Bread
• Blueberry Muffins 

More frugal news:

• I ended up spending the money saved on groceries on a "lunch out," so no joy there. In fact, it has been very hard not to eat out this week, after last week's enforced snow-in. Pure temptation and poor planning. I have lunch materials in house... and yet!
• For my birthday I was awarded a free Starbuck's drink (coupon), free yoga class (coupon), discounted dry cleaning (coupon), and invitations to all sorts of ridiculous things like auto shows (huh?). I will be using the coupons, but not the invitations.
• I am still hoarding the Starbucks' ground coffee bags that enable you to get a tall coffee for free. I love it! Walk in, hand over the bag, and get a free tall brewed coffee (my drink) for free. I've turned this into a treat for myself.
• I have successfully negotiated my new lease and will be moving as of 3.1, overlapping with the old lease. By April, Jack and I should be in the new apartment. This move will require decluttering, selling certain items (on craigslist, I think), and donating others. Although there is more space in the new apartment (by 50%), I don't want to move all the same stuff (again) with no thought involved.
• For my birithday, my folks sent me cash. Put it in savings or spend it on a nice dinner out? (Do you see a theme?) 

Yoga Class

I must say that I love returning to yoga. For me, being in a class for weekly yoga sessions means I will improve so much more quickly and will stick with it.

In Paris, I loved my yoga class and, combined with the constant walking and minimalist eating, made me lose about 20 pounds, increase flexibility, and my mental state was also improved. Julie's sessions, in her tiny apartment, were simply marvelous.

Now, my class is very much an Iyengar class, where we spend the 90 minutes on five or six poses, improving our postures and weight-bearing stances, improving breathing, to find the correct and best stretch. The other people in the class are mostly women about my age and a couple of men.

And--guess what!--I got a free class for my birthday! Well, thanks.

Note: this is not my picture, but this is what yoga feels like, when it's right, to me. Yummy stretch in a serene world.

February Frugal Challenge

Another one, me to me...

Clean out the damn freezer and pantry!

I need to cut 15% of my expenses overall, and my biggest one (outside of rent) is food, which in my "categories" includes buying groceries and liquor for the house, and eating out.

Soooo... first stop is emptying the pantry, fridge, and freezer of food I have already purchased.

Step two is to stop wasting food--mostly over-bought fruit and vegetables--that go bad before I eat them.

Step three is to buy wisely, which leads to cooking (and eating) wisely. In part by cutting my spending, consciously, from about $60 a week to $45 a week... including Jack's food, which has increased $.20/can, or $.40/day. And it matters to me that he eats healthy food.

So for February: grocery money can only go to replace dairy, fruit, vegetables, and whole grains. And cat food. Spending only $45/week (which will be no more than $180/month--huge for one person!) and utilizing resources creatively. I have, for example, potatoes, beans, rice, pasta, chicken stock in the cupboards; meat and fish, berries, coffee, potatoes, more stock, and veggies in freezer; apples, lemons, carrots stockpiled in fridge.

If I can save, that will be $60 for savings account, as well as anything else I can find from coupons, sales, and gift cards.

Today: made carrot soup and banana bread for weekend. So much for carrots, but 5-6 servings of the most delicious soup, all natural!

At the end of Day Four: Snowpocalypse

Yesterday I:

• caught up on The Daily Show (3 weeks)
• cooked my favorite carrot soup
• washed dishes in dishwasher and by hand
• responded to email, including Facebook
• posted pictures on Facebook
• burned 15+ CDs into iTunes library so I can sell CDs
• culled out another 10 CDs for burning/selling
• approved new retirement allocation
• scheduled March payments for March bills
• scheduled transfer into savings of last week's grocery savings
• juiced 10 Texas red grapefruits slowly going bad on my dining room table
• blogged
• played with Jack
• rescheduled this week's friendly lunch, friendly dinner, and curricular events for for next week
• rescheduled doctor's appointment and lease-signing meeting
• continued to organize student project taking place in 5 weeks
• started next Goodwill bundle while also cataloging my current wardrobe
• organized year's savings plans through December 2011
• made a date for brunch tomorrow at my favorite restaurant, to signal end of Snowpocalypse
• resent manuscript+ in correct format (duh!)
• wrote 5 new pages of new manuscript!
• made pantry/freezer/fridge challenge for February 2011

Not bad for being snowbound, Day 4.

January 31 -- Check in with 2011 goals

 

1--Improving Overall Health: since 1.5, I've

• signed up for and am attending yoga classes weekly
• joined Weight Watchers
• added extra biking to weekly scheme... still working on that one!

2--Living Situation: very recently, it looks as if by March 1, I will be in a new apartment, owned by friends. The advantages include:

• 50% more space overall
• HE washer-dryer included
• an additional closet
• outside, enclosed patio space
• a bigger complex with more green space and no one looking in my windows directly!
• still within 3 miles of campus and nice biking routes as well as easy drive
• a swanky wet bar!
• less rent! (which will go right into the IRA fund)

This means 2011 goal #2 will be resolved by March, and in a way that will make me very happy. Amazing!

3--Managing my Resources: working on it. Since 1.5, I've

• organized specific daily times (3x daily) to check and send email
• cleaned out 3 email inboxes and unsubscribed from multiple 'new sellers
• focused my two-class-day weeks to allow 1 more day on campus for meet-and-greet with students
• reassessed/assigned my retirement funding and IRA for improved outcome
• continued to pay off credit card debt and not incurred new debt
• made one Goodwill run, mostly clothing
• bought no new books but downloaded free classics to my Nook (for 50 Books 2011)
• started to burn CDs to laptop/iPod for selling
• pulled out CDs, DVDs, and books for selling

4--Improving My Community. Since 1.5, I have

• reconnected with 2 friends via email; now sending weekly quick-touch emails
• made plans to visit one in march for long weekend
• this week, contacted 2 friends on campus for drink/dinner meetings
• connected a colleague into my divisional project and made a lunch date with her to talk about her project
• reached out to connect 5 artists from local theatre scene into project

5--Bringing Creative Closure. Since 1.5, I have

• started working on manuscript submission to publisher
• already writing a new novel
• started talking about a new on-campus project with one fo the colleagues I met this week
• organized, bullied, spear-headed departmental project (via creative management) so much so that colleagues who initially pulled out and forced me to redefine the entire program now want back in to play in my playground!

Lots of "start-up energy" and circumstances. Hopefully, this will sustain me through the coming two months (crazy period!) and then into summer. I am actually surprised at how much has bee started and accomplished in a short time.

2011 Goal #3: Managing my Resources

Again, this is an overlapping goal and intention: money, belongings, time, and even friends.

Money is easiest: paying off debt, shaping retirement funds more effectively, selling and donating unwanted things, and re-investing in myself more wisely.

Belongings means using the things I love often, giving away, discarding, or selling the things I do not need or use, and using Morris's dictum as a guideline... which will help eliminate impulse shopping and useless belongings. Keeping a minimalism guideline, I can focus on what I need and love vs. everything else.

And stop distracting myself with "stuff." Have I ever mentioned I love the TV show Clean House? (BTW, this is not my house, below!)

Time is the most important of all, really, and the key to everything. This includes setting boundaries for others and myself in "technology" time (like emails, internet, etc.) and establishing time for me to work on classroom work, scholarship, and creative work... a goal I always have.

Again: distractions. I'm reading Focus by Leo Babauta (free on the web here), which is a simple but powerful text on how to "focus in the age of distraction" (wow!)--it is helping me by identifying new sites of distraction, but also confirming what I already know (I don't want to be available 24/7 to electronic/digital devices, let alone people!) and there are strategies for creating effective boundaries. Time-wasters like mindless TV, video games, and reading admittedly trashy books--necessary in their own ways, but too big a portion of my time now--redirected to the 50 books I listed, my own creative and scholarly goals, and simply being more mindful. And yes, still enjoying "time wasting"!

Community is the big resource I want to manage (goal #4): I have work to do on this one. Honestly, I have trouble stepping into already-formed communities, like church groups. Since the community of my department at My U has dissolved, that internal community would have to be of my own making. Which means stepping up my own connections to chosen colleagues. More, it means identifying and creating my community among family, friends, and colleagues, including real and virtual communities. Community is a lot of work, both on an individual basis and a group basis.

As we get older, communities are tougher to find and maintain. I have noticed friends dropping out because of marriage, babies, moving, and even death. I have stopped talking to or connecting with people because of my over-involvement with work, time, or simply laziness. In this way, social networks like Facebook have actually improved connecting, because of the already-available platform for emailing notes and pictures, low-pressure ways of staying in touch.

But communities are a huge resource, especially for single people, because that maintains your health (according to studies) and keeps you involved and joyful. Like watching your money, it is important to watch your friends, family, and other social groups. More on this, tomorrow.

But managing my resources means being mindful of my resources--all of them--and balancing them, again mindfully. Being aware of the variety and strength of each one, and maintaining each one as well (for some reason, I just flashed on the medieval morality play EVERYMAN! And I am so a teacher!).